Thursday Gratitudes!

I cannot believe a full week has passed since the last post. It's been so wacky that I thought I would not be able to post my list today. However, it's important for all of us to take time out and remember the good things. Celebrate the successes and thank our lucky stars or the people around us for making things better.

So, here's my list. And if you read it, I encourage you to add a list of your own in the COMMENT section.

Things that make me go...thanks!
1. Hugh Groman for all his fryer training. It came in handy on a job today.
2. Lots of work
3. The West Wing - yeah I know I'm behind the times
4. living in NY
5. my nephew. He's a pretty rockin' kid.

The BIG Daddy - Gratitude Thursday

I decided to do these weekly gratitudes on Thursdays since both gRatitde and ThuRsday both had Rs in them. Swear to god. In fact Thursday is the only day that has an R. It was not until after the first list was posted that I realized that it would correspond with the mac daddy of gratitude days, Thanksgiving.

There is lots of controversy around this holiday. The commercialism, the treatment of the Native Americans, excess when so many are fighting for survival. Even still, I can say it's one of my favorite holidays. While I will spend the morning with my parents watching the parade, I am working for the first time on this holiday. I'll be in the kitchen of someone else's house today and tomorrow I head to my parents house on LI for family festivities.

This year has been about transitions and starting again. Not easy. But there are still many things for which to be grateful.

1. an invitation to see the Macys Thanksgiving Day parade on the parade route!
2. generous support from those around me
3. my furry nubbins, Lincoln and Maxie
4. a warm apartment to call my own
5. living in a city that never sleeps

Your turn. What are you thankful for?

The Chakras Explained – SACRAL

The chakras are a band of energy flowing through the midline of the body. They follow the line of the spine, if that helps solidify the ideas around energy – or something that may be FELT, but not seen.

There are 7 chakras in the body, just as there 7 sets of glands in the body. Two weeks ago we tackled the root chakra. Today we discuss the second:

THE SACRAL CHAKRA

When I was first introduced to the chakras, I called the second one the “Belly” Chakra. However, when I asked my students to place their hands on their belly, they set them on their 3rd Chakra – the solar plexus – and not the second. Using the word “belly” is not specific enough. While many people may not know where their sacrum is, it becomes a great teaching moment.

The second chakra (or Svadhisthana in Sanskrit) is located two finger widths below the belly button. Place your hand there, close your eyes and take three full and complete breaths.

What do you feel? With FEEL being the operative word here.

The sacral chakra is the center of our feelings and creativity. It nurtures the birthing of ideas, artistic endevours and children. This is where our social connection and sensuality stems from, along with our awareness of living in the present moment – the “now.”

If the root is about survival, the sacral is slightly more developed. With the introduction of feelings, svadhisthana focuses on our inner child. What feels good to our body and mind.

If all is well, you may feel confidence, happiness and the flow of creative juices. You have strong relationships and have a healthy desire for sex, pleasure and life.

If you are prone to eating disorders, low back pain, depression, yeast infections or impotency, there’s a good chance that there’s an imbalance in svadhisthana.

So, if you need to open the flow of your sacral energy center, what do you do?

1. BELLY DANCE! No, you don’t need zills or to bare your midriff (but that may help!) just channel your inner god or goddess and shake your hips. I totally recommend typing in “belly dance music” on Youtube to find some great inspiration and just let loose!

2.  Take a hot BATH or a soak in a hot tub. The sacral chakra is associated with the element of water. The flowing quality of water will allow the energy to flow.

3. EAT sensual foods. Warm, gooey chocolate; juicy peaches, fresh asparagus. What we find sensual may differ greatly. You know what you like. Experiment and have fun. Solo or with your partner!

4. MEDITATE. Using the mantra, “I allow pleasure, sweetness, and sensuality into my life” find stillness for at least 10 minutes and send your energy and awareness into your second chakra.

5. Do YOGA. When teaching a class focusing on svadhithana I tend to teach hip openers. Gomukasana, Pigeon, Baddha Konasana and Wide Legged Forward Fold.

6. Challenge your CREATIVITY. Satisfy your inner child and grab some paints or some colored pencils and doodle. Or if writing's your thing, weave an epic tale. Don't censor yourself. Allow yourself to dream and imagine, then put it to paper or canvas!

It should be no surprise that the glands associated with the sacral chakra are the gonads – the testes in the male and the ovaries in the female. In males, the testes, located in the scrotum, secrete hormones called androgens including testosterone. These hormones affect the male characteristics of sexual development, growth of facial hair and pubic hair, as well as sperm production. In females, the ovaries, located on both sides of the uterus, produce estrogen and progesterone as well as eggs. These hormones control the development of female traits and they are also involved in reproductive functions.

How open is your sacral energy center? What do you do to keep the energy flowing? Feel free to use the comment section below to share your thoughts, opinions and questions.

The Virtues of Alone Time

As I prepared to leave Atlanta and head to grad school a few years ago my friend and fellow Souper Jenny soup slinger, Merrideth Ziesse gave me the best advice. "Live alone," she said. I thought about the excitement of being in school again, having a roommate and saving money. However I did heed her advice. I fought for a small one bedroom 2 blocks from campus and moved in a few months before classes began.

It was honestly the best decision I could have made. My days were crazy with teaching and taking classes, rehearsing and meetings. While our classes were small, there were always people around and I totally felt part of a community. However, I always had my little hideaway where I could find quiet and stillness.

Humans in general are social beings. We begin to make friends at an early age because we know it's more fun to play with others than by ourselves. We want to be a part of group and have a shared experience. We strive to have others care about us, almost as much as we support those that we love. We need compadres to bounce ideas, share laughs and vent about our day.

While I prefer going to the movies or dining with others, I don't have a problem doing either by myself. Especially if I have a spontaneous hankering and cannot find a companion to join me. There have been many times that I've encouraged friends to go out by themselves (or as Julia Cameron of the Artist's Way suggested taking yourself on an Artist's Date) and was met with an uncomfortable response. Those friends were afraid of being perceived as loners and thought it weird to go out solo. I think it's due to the confusion of the being alone vs. being lonely.

a·lone/əˈlōn/

Adjective:	Having no one else present; on one's own. Without others' help or participation; single-handed.

lone·ly/ˈlōnlē/

Adjective:

Sad because one has no friends or company. Without companions; solitary: "passing long lonely hours looking onto the street".

Being lonely has the added emotion of sadness. You can be alone and be joyous. I promise.

As we get older and find ourselves in committed relationships, there may be an imbalance with the amount of individual time vs. couple time. I find when I coach couples there is usually one of the pair that prefers to spend most of his/her free time with the partner and the other that craves time alone. It's this disconnect that begs the discussion of The Virtues of Alone Time.

So, why is time alone so important? What can it offer?

1. Space to find your personal perspective.

What are your values and desires? With information and the opinions of others flying around at break neck speeds, it's difficult to know what you believe. Don't remember? Take the space to reconnect with or discover your values.

2. Doing things that YOU love to do.

Like horror films or perhaps obscure foreign films that your partners dislikes? You can go see them solo! How about your love of BBQ when most of your friends are vegan? If you go alone, you have the final say. No one can tell you what to do or not to do. Pretty empowering, no?

3. The ability to regroup and recharge.

We live in a fast paced world. We multi-task, we have overbooked schedules and most of the time enjoy being busy. Taking alone time - in the form of reading, a scenic run or some body work - allows you to charge the batteries, de-stress and relax.

4. Feeling safe and secure in your body and mind.

Being alone can be scary, no doubt. However when we find stillness and quiet we begin to remember ourselves. The connection between our bodies and minds. The strength we have as individuals and our own personal power. Yes, my friend, you are fierce. And it's most important that knowledge is understood fully by YOU rather than expressed by a friend.

What are you perspectives on alone time? How do you spend it? Please share your thoughts in the comment section below.

Gratitude Thursday

There's lots to be grateful for this week. Here are the top 5 for today.

1. cats who let me sleep until 7:15AM (rather than the usual 6:30AM)
2. meeting new people
3. steady work
4. progress
5. matinee movies

Please take a moment to add yours below by clicking on the COMMENT link.

Learning Something New 1

After each wedding ceremony I perform, I always learn something new. The first one taught me to encourage pre-marital counseling. And after that it's been a mix. Sometimes I learn things that clients need, and other times I get an education on things I need to bring into future experiences.

Today, I officiated the ceremony of a lovely couple from California. I got nervous on the train ride over, but was strong as a bull once I arrived. I made a plan with the DJ since there were a few unanswered questions about the procession and the recession (including using the couple's DOG!) and checked in with the event planner about the marriage license.

So, the first thing I learned today is:

1. You MUST remind the couple to place the marriage license IN whatever bag they are using the day of the wedding.

Needless to say, the license was left at the hotel, so now I have to meet the bride and groom and their 2 witnesses  tomorrow to make it legal.

When I met with the bride in her bridal suite, she was very quiet and very nervous. Since she was alone  and had no bridesmaids, I sat with her for a while and asked her about the last few days. Being able to share stories certainly opened her up and relaxed her a bit. However, I had to take care of other things, so I asked her if there was someone else she would like to join her. After she told me, I made it my personal mission to find this person and bring her to the bride.

So the second thing I learned was:

2. In stressful times, make sure you are surrounded with those that ease the tension. Talk you down from the anxiety and make you laugh. And do whatever it takes to keep yourself safe from those who will stress you out or will not be there for you.

Once the groom arrived with the dog and the rings, we were ready to go. However, he was even more nervous than the bride was. Right before the ceremony he was drinking a gin and tonic, but he was still a wreck and the drink was not helping. All of a sudden he said, "I want to run a lap." So I encouraged him to do it. His friend lead him out in front of the venue and they ran down the street!

When he came back, he was a changed man. Not only was he NOT out of breath, but he was completely calm and ready.

And lastly, it was confirmed to:

3. Listen to your body. It will tell you what it needs - be it rest or exercise or a gin and tonic!

Under the chuppah, the couple faced each other and grasped hands. All was well and they were totally there for each other. A beautiful thing to witness as they begin the next stage of their life together.

Many congratulations to another happy couple!

Thursday GRATITUDES!

I'm not gonna lie, this list was hard. I don't need to bore you with the crappy details, but I had to take a moment to remind myself of the good things. This week it just took a few more moments.

1. Warm clothes
2. increased work
3. steel cut oats
4. Pandora
5. possibilities

Now you. Click on the COMMENT link below and add yours!

The Chakras Explained – ROOT

I don’t remember when I first encountered the chakras, but I use them regularly in my yoga classes. Yes, they can be a little ‘out there,’ but I have seen some a-ha moments using them with even some of my life coaching clients. So, let’s cut through the woo-woo and get acquainted from the bottom to the top.

THE ROOT

The Root Chakra (or Muladhara in Sanskrit) is located at the perineum, between the sexual organs and the anus. Others say it’s at the base of the spine, but I like to bring the energy lower in the body.

Take a moment to find stillness and close your eyes. Bring your energy and awareness to your root. In fact, take three complete breaths into that area.

No, do it now. Close your eyes and find your root before you continue. No cheating or you’re missing out.

Good.

The root chakra or energy center houses our sense of survival, stability and security. It’s the center of our basic needs, our fight or flight response and feeling comfortable in our environment. Were you able to feel that?

If all is well, you should be able to feel grounded, trusting, courageous and have a healthy dose of self-esteem. If the root center is blocked, you may feel insecure, anxious and restless. You may also feel possessive, materialistic, lacking discipline or constantly get sick.

So right now you are either patting yourself on the back or completely freaking out. If your root chakra is open and working, congratulations. You stand on your own two feet unafraid and have vitality, strength and stillness. Celebrate that.

I find once I move to a new apartment or city, my root is always a little off. Since I moved back across the country 8 months ago, there has been lots of insecurity and anxiety.

So, what do we do to balance muladhara?

1. Get out in NATURE. Take a walk and concentrate on the SMELLS around you. The root is attached to our sense of smell. Reconnect with that and you will open your root.

2. DANCE. Yeah, yeah I know, but trust me here. Put on music with lots of drums or bass and dance around. Stomp your feet, pump your fists - primal, energetic and FUN.

3. Close your eyes and MEDITATE for 10 minutes with the mantra, “I Have Everything I Need.” This one is courtesy of my old roommate and blues diva Nancy Sterman. A great suggestion!

4. Take an hour and ORGANIZE one room or one section of your living space. Adding structure and order to your home will certainly build your stability.

5. Practice YOGA. For my yogis out there, when I do a chakra class for the root, I make sure to incorporate Janu Sirsasana, Supta Baddha Konasana, Uttanasana and grounding into your feet poses like Tadasana.

Each of the chakras is linked to a gland. So, if thinking about energy in your root is too weird, think of connecting with your adrenal glands, which sit on top of your kidneys. The inner part of the adrenal glands secretes the hormone ADRENALINE that affects blood pressure, heart rate and sweating. The outer secretes many different hormones that control the use of fats, proteins and carbohydrates in the body.

So, how open is your root? How’s your sense of security and self-esteem? Did you find anything surprising? Anything you would add?

Use the comment section below to share your thoughts.

Thursdays are for GRATITUDE!

When I had my personal blog, Go West, Young Woman, I posted my daily gratitudes on a regular basis. Five of 'em. It was place for me to stop bitching and even during some really frustrating days, to remind myself of the goodness around me.

So, I hereby devote each Thursday to GRATITUDES. I will start us off, and then please add yours in the comment section.

1. sunshine
2. plenty of toilet paper now that I'm out of tissues
3. men in togas - go Halloween!
4. power through the storm
5. the re-opening of the 1 train

Go!